Are you expecting your first child and wondering how your life will be different? We all know that changes will come, but often wonder in what way. I’m going to shed some light on where you may experience change!
I don’t think anyone could’ve prepared me for the changes that accompanied becoming a mom for the first time. To put it simple, becoming a mom changed everything in my life. I have a huge family with lots of kids that have been running around over the years. Often times I’ve babysat or had the kids sleep over. I remember some years ago picking up my little cousins even when they were just a few months old, and keeping them for the weekend when I was out of school, several weekends in a row, and then returning them home of course, ha. Weekend duty was for me; I looked forward to it. I absolutely loved children, especially babies. Oh, and I also worked in childcare with all different ages for over 6 years, but again I say, becoming a mom changed everything in my life even with the “experience” I had prior to.
In case you’re wondering, it definitely changed things for the BETTER, but I’m going to share the 3 biggest ways I saw change from the beginning.
1. Your Vision Changes
From the moment that I realized I was pregnant, my vision for the future immediately changed. I immediately started planning for the future now that I knew I was going to be a mom and prepared for my new reality as best I could. It’s so different when you dream of the day you will become a mom, and then that time is actually coming. I was so excited to plan it all out! And then it was here! I was a mom! Say what?! ha.
Becoming a mom allowed me to see many things differently in life. It was like looking through a lens that you thought made sense before, but after giving birth it became so much clearer. To be honest y’all, I swear it was like a transformation.
As I write this, all I can think is that I loved a good puzzle before the baby, but after having her, I became a problem-solving expert, ha. It was like…if I run to the store now and leave the baby home with dad, when do I need to pump breastmilk before leaving, how long can I be gone before I need to do it again, when is the baby’s naptime, when I get back do I have enough time before she’s hungry again, is she going to notice I’m gone and miss me…the list goes on, lol. NOTHING MATTERS MORE THAN THE BABY! Which leads me to #2…
2. Your Priorities Shift
After giving birth, I immediately felt a sense of relief. Relief that I was getting my body back and relief that I heard a crying baby, and even more relief once I realized she was perfectly healthy. In that moment, after laying eyes on my baby, my priorities immediately shifted. Everything that I was planning for the future was all about this new baby. The things I wanted to do for me would take a back seat until everything I needed to do for her was done. I was no longer child-free, but instead I have this little human being that counts on me for EVERYTHING (and now makes me late everywhere I go, ha). The person I was before the baby is definitely not the person I am today. To be quite honest, you appreciate that person so much more and wouldn’t change a single thing about it!
My daughter even as young as she is, will watch me all day for as long as we’re in the same space/room. When people tell you that kids are always watching you, it couldn’t be more true and it starts VERY early. That being said, another reason priorities change is because you know you have this little babe watching and learning from you, and you want nothing more than to set the perfect example.
3. You Sometimes Lose Yourself
Now, while I was experiencing all these new things in life, it was important that I didn’t lose myself in the midst of it all. I wanted to still be me, but a better me for my baby. I want my daughter to experience the best version of me that there is. Now, I’m far from perfect and never will be, but I will be the best person that I can possibly be for her. And I think we all want the same.
Even with the mistakes that I may or may not make in life, I will lead by example in showing her how to overcome the obstacle. I think it’s important for you to remember that NOTHING WILL BE PERFECT, including you. Don’t get down on yourself when things aren’t as you’d like, or when you feel like you’ve made a mistake.
I had my daughter during the midst of the Covid-19 pandemic, and while I was out on maternity leave, one thing that I had to remind myself about was not to lose myself in just being a mom, because there was so much more to who I was. Before the baby, I was a paralegal, a blogger, a daughter, a sister, a cousin, a friend and so much more. So now I’m also a mom, but not just a mom. Make sense?
To summarize, becoming a mom is one of the best life experiences. When you’re going through this period in your life, it’s important to know that you will change your way of thinking as your vision becomes clearer. You tend to start doing “motherly” things that you didn’t even know you had in you! Priorities shift. If you were used to putting yourself first, that changes quickly as you start to think of the baby first. It’s almost as if you start thinking, if the baby is ok, then you are too. Lastly, in the midst of putting the baby first, don’t lose yourself and who you were before the baby! You are still all of those things, you’ve only just added one of the best titles to who you are. The title of Mama!
Please note: Featured Image used in this post was taken by Kaleigh Brayboy of www.kaleighannphotography.com! I just loved my maternity photo shoot with her!