Do you ever feel like you just aren’t balancing everything well, or that you just aren’t doing enough even though you’re doing the absolute best that you can?
I think there comes a time when we all start to feel like we’re just not doing enough, or can’t bother someone else with what we need even though they have offered and we could definitely use the help! What about the time when your baby got poked or prodded by the doctor and it immediately made you feel bad? To be quite honest, I think we oftentimes feel much worse than the baby.
Here are 4 things to keep in mind when you feel the overwhelm of being a Mama:
1. Everyone Needs Time Away
If anyone ever tells you that they don’t need any time away from their children, they are lying. Straight up. Everyone needs time away whether they are just heading to work, riding to the store in peace, want to step away for a much needed pedicure, hang out with some friends or maybe just a moment of quiet to nap or read a book. Everyone could use that time to themselves without the children around even if it’s just for a quick moment.
When my daughter was born, I sometimes just wanted a moment to rest, sleep or shower. I didn’t want the baby to leave the house, but I just wanted a few moments where I didn’t have to worry about rushing to get back to her. I knew I could take my time because someone else was keeping an eye on her for me. That may not seem like much time away, but it meant a lot to have someone step in and cover for those moments.
Don’t beat yourself up with guilt for feeling like you need a moment away from your kids. Everyone does. The time away is actually beneficial to you because it provides a “refresher.” It gives you time to miss the kids and the kids time to miss you.
2. Everyone Needs Help
This one seems like one of the hardest for people to ask for or acknowledge that they need. Or even when they do acknowledge they need the help, they oftentimes won’t accept it when it’s offered to them. That person is ME. I had the hardest time accepting help when my daughter was born. I was always saying “I got it” or “I’ll do it.” I had to remind myself that it’s important to accept the help. If someone wants to help you, let them! If you’d rather do certain things yourself, then allow them to do the things you don’t mind, like maybe washing the bottles (or loading the dishwasher if you have one). May seem like a small and simple task in the midst of the surrounding chaos, but if you have Dr. Brown’s bottles, then you know the struggle, ha. There are just so many parts that have to be washed with those and if you have someone willing, girl, take them up on that offer!
3. Realize That Somethings Can Wait Until Tomorrow
I think sometimes as a new mom, we all want to be “super moms” and get everything done at once. I actually hate that term. All good moms are super moms. We’re all out here trying our best and doing the best we can which IS enough! If you’ve been busy with baby all day, then know that the carpet can be vacuumed tomorrow. Did you forget the laundry detergent? Those clothes can be washed tomorrow. It’s ok that not everything can be done in the same day. Don’t overwhelm yourself. Slow down, take a breath and know, it CAN wait! Taking care of your babe is what’s most important. Don’t stress it!
4. You’re Doing Better Than You Realize
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “you’re your own biggest critic,” right? Well if you haven’t, now you have! Most times we’re harder on ourselves than anyone and most things we notice about ourselves, went unnoticed by those around us. Take a moment to think about it and realize that you’re doing much better than you think. While you’re being very hard on yourself, there is someone else standing by admiring “your way” and everything about you.
Take a moment to think about it and remember these 4 things as you’re sitting there letting mom-guilt take over:
- Everyone needs a break;
- Everyone needs help;
- Know that somethings can wait until tomorrow, and lastly;
- You’re doing much better than you realize!
We can be so hard on ourselves sometimes and feel guilty about every little thing. Breathe Mama! Pat yourself on the back, because you’re doing just fine! Your babe doesn’t need a perfect Mama, he or she just needs YOU!